Coercing to write gratitude

I just wrote in my other blog a post titled 'Existential Angst.' How can I write something like that when there are so many things in life to be thankful about. This seems like an alter ego in operation. Few minutes after posting that entry, I venture to crawl over here and admonish the other 'me.' Why do I do it? Very human. Perhaps thats why man clings on to god for he never can change. He is the same. The same when we were four and the same when we shall be fifty. There is a strange peace in that thought. He can never change. How wonderful. In spite of everything how does one comprehend such love. I would love to be like that. Same. I know that as a person I should and will evolve but then the basic me. Can I keep it intact? Can I be loving towards my friend who has betrayed me. Can I not curse the person who knew that I was vulnerable and ventured too personal. Can I forgive my fellow being who has been not-so-good with me. If I choose to be non-violent and prove to be a child of my god, I should be like that. Forgiving. Loving. Peace loving.

This is a blog exclusively for gratitude but what am I writing here. I am thankful for many things here. Today morning's paper had Usha Jesudasan's article about the ahimsa way. I am thankful to her for gradually showing me to be peaceful and forgiving. This post also extends a forgiveness to all those who were not-so-good with me in the past. I am no one to hold grudges. I forgive you from the depths - in word, deed and thought. If my life permits that we should meet again, I would be glad to sit down with you and tell you that 'you made a difference.'